Archive for August, 2010

How many of you knew I was watching Melissa and Joey?

I bet a few people suspected. I have always had a complicated relationship with Melissa Joan Hart, and I’ve continued that complicated relationship with the dawn of the Who’s the Boss knock-off, Melissa (Hart) and Joey (Lawrence). It doesn’t have Ferguson, it doesn’t have hubcaps on the wall (see below, [also, that link leads to an awesomely banal tale of randomness] for hub caps only, not for midriff), there’s no Alyssa Milano, and it sure as hell doesn’t have “Whoa!” It is as devoid of genuine laughs as Clarissa Explains it All, which isn’t all bad. A really bad sitcom with familiar faces is sometimes all we have to get us through the day. (I think Andy Warhol said that) Hart has clearly had some rough years, which makes her more accessible, which makes her hotter, so, yeah, I still love the show.

Hub Caps, people.

I also wanted to point out that Seth McFarlane and Kevin Smith provided guest voices to the new ‘sode of Phineas and Ferb which debuted last Friday. I no longer think Dr. Detroit was inspired by Seamus Heaney, it was all Clerks. Kenneth from 30 Rock was also on. Not on IMDb, but heard on the ‘sode. Confirmed by a Kevin Smith tweet quoted on message board. Snoochie Boogies!

I guess that guy at Downtown Disney spoke too soon! (or maybe we should have asked about Perry rather than Phineas and Ferb):

Undead or Alive: The best straight to DVD Zombie Western. Evar.

Ok, so my headline is a bit tongue in cheek. Nonetheless, it’s 100% true, which probably isn’t saying much, but I liked it better than Fido, which also isn’t saying a whole lot. Aargh. Comparisons are difficult. Let’s just say Undead or Alive was more than a passable Zom-Com that raised a few chuckles, was totally uneven, and had a twist at the end that I should have seen coming, I suppose, seeing as how it grew out of a total non sequitur to the plot. I also watched it on several different media over two days (I went to bed at 9pm last night), so, like Chocki, I may be a little flighty in my assessment.)

Chris Kattan plays Chris Kattan, obviously, James Denton (Desperate Housewives) plays Elmer, an Army deserter, and Navi Rawat (Numb3r5) plays Sue (not Souix, as Kattan asks), a Native American. It also features Brian Posehn (from lots of things, including Super Karate Monkey Death Car. It’s a small role, but it lets me show off my geekitude and u need to watch it. Now). There’s a zombie outbreak and Kattan and Elmer go on the run from a zombie posse, meeting up with Sue, who knows little about the Wild Wild West (which Escape Club stole from this.), having been educated in the NYC. There’s some amusing banter, some anachronism, there’s a confrontation where the crazy sheriff, Matt Bresser (who is quite good) gets his legs shot off as a zombie, and rides piggy back on Cletus until he fashions splints, and everyone dies (some for the second time) except two of the heroes (but which ones? Which ones?) Easy peasy, elbow greasy.

The script is fairly sharp and sometimes clever. It’s a straight to DVD release. Don’t expect a lot, you won’t be disappointed. Culturally insensitive goodness below:

Killer Klowns are killer

I’m having something of an existential horror crisis, as I’m inundated with awesome scary movies on all sides and yet, I still watch a bunch of crappy movies.  Even in a year long horror fest, I guess you still have to have something to pass the time.  I watched Killer Klowns from Outer Space yesterday, which wasn’t by any means horrible and probably well worth watching for the fairly awesome 80s special effects done apparently on a shoestring.  If nothing else, the movie made me have somewhat more respect for Jeffrey Katzenberg, or, rather, his dream about Silly Hillbillies from Mars.  (which turned out not to be his dream, after all)  He was right about Gummi Bears, though.  I am also looking forward to Andrew Stanton’s John Carter of Mars, though I understand the books suck.  I will have the first one read before the movie comes out though.

Nonetheless, KKfOS was watchable 80s fluff.  Not scary, but also not enough skin.  I think I’ll watch Black Christmas this evening.

Finished Blood Sucking Fiends. Reading You Suck

I finished Blood Sucking Fiends, which, as I intimated before, is quite good, readable, though not as funny as Lamb, which is phenomenal.  BSF is the story of a young woman, Jody, living in San Francisco who gets turned into a vampire and must deal with the aftermath.  She finds another transplant, Tommy Flood, fresh off the turnip truck from Indiana, and shacks up with him mostly because he works nights and can be her Renfield during the day.  All she has to do is boink him not infrequently.  (Yes, I used boink. Get over it.)  One thing leads to another, there’s a confrontation with the alpha vampire, broad ethnic and sexual orientation jokes are made, and easy peasy, maple treesy, Tommy is a vampire and the alpha vampire is sealed in bronze.  I suppose San Francisco was chosen as the epicenter of blood borne illnesses, and it works fine.  SF is one of the few cities that is always a character in whatever story in which it appears.

While I’m puzzling over the vampire comedy, the thing it got me thinking about was the original Bible Comix.  For what reason, I know not.  Lamb destroyed much of the story I had planned for Bible Comix, in the sense that nearly everything I had sketched out happened in Lamb.  However, the few things that did not happen in Lamb (ie, Jesus’ vs the mummies and the visit to the library at Alexandria) and one of the things that did happen (kung fu) can still show up in Bible Comix as flashbacks and what not.  So I’m working on it, again.

Atomic robo cartoon

Even after months of reading all the world’s best comix, JT’s favorite is still Atomic Robo, a fact that does not unsettle me in the least. Atomic Robo is a great comic.  It’s funny and frequently smart and Dr. Dinosaur is a truly great comic book villain. Though I’ve never gotten into Celvinger’s other stuff like 8-BIt theatre, I do have a soft spot for AR (not Arkansas, though I do love Hot Springs, true home of Bill Clinton).  Now, it seems, it’s also going to be an animated short film. It doesn’t look as if Dr Dino will be in it, but it still looks cool.

via io9

I have no authority to review video games

Luckily, this is the internet, so authority is not needed. However, having played a number of scrolling video games in my youth (think Super Mario, or Chip and Dale’s Rescue Rangers), and having tried my hand at battle games like Street Fighter in my college years, I feel some qualification to review Shank, as it is basically a combination of those two styles. Throw in some cool Venture Bros./Samurai Jack style animation and a story about luchadore revenge and I’m pretty hooked. It looked awesome on the big screen, as well. For what it’s worth, JT, who has quite a bit more experience with the newfangled game system gaming, liked it quite a bit. Old timers like me, look into it.

Machete comes out Friday! It’s my birthday!

Coolest awesomest helpful app

JT found this awesome “Fail Maker” app on a routine search through the app store on his phone.  It should greater simplify and increase my postings of both “Win” and “Fail” related photos.  My favorite is below.  The Pepper Pod was crazy, but May did an awesome job.

Driving around listening to Car Talk omnibus

JT and I spent the morning after breakfast (about which I’ll blog in a few minutes, along with a corresponding awesome discovery) driving around the Greater Cincinnati Metropolitan area taking pictures of cool stuff with some resonance.

First, we drove down Mainstrasse, where I was super pleased to see the very visible displays of support for tolerance and acceptance of the GLBT community which has recently been in the national news for a string of attacks over the last several months.  The most recent involved a family member of one of my best good friends.  As with most things driven by hate, these attacks appear to have backfired, as Covington is a pretty diverse and tolerant place.  We have an openly gay City Commissioner, and are one of the few cities in Kentucky with a human rights ordinance.  Already Covington is getting attention for its robust response.  Pictures below.

On a somewhat related note, we also saw a couple of the Shepard Fairey murals, one of which was taken down in Covington, but another one of which dons the side of the Toyota Collision Center about a block from my apartment.  I thought I had a picture of that one, but I don’t. Maybe I put it up earlier.  At any rate, I don’t feel bad about taking pictures, as that’s a Shep Fairey thing, and the docents at the Contemporary Arts Center have gone all Gestapo on taking pictures.  Art wants to be photographed!

All in all, a great morning.

This is precious. Will Lex Luthor soon be peeing on Ford?

I am loving io9 more and more every day. Do yourself a flavor and read this, a Superman/Batman comic in the style of Calvin and Hobbes. Pure awesome.

OMG, Scott Pilgrim totally rocks (Dr. Scott)

I haven’t seen every movie based on a comic book, nor read the Scott Pilgrim comics (yet), but I can, without reservation say that Scott Pilgrim vs The World is the best comic book movie ever made.  (better even, than Kick-Ass, by a fairly safe margin) While I stand on less solid ground, I feel confident asserting that, in addition, it is the best video game themed movie ever made.  On that front, it surely has not much competition.

I took JT to see it tonight, and he loved it as much as I did.  I loved the pacing, the 8 bit feel, the cameo from Ann from Arrested Development, with whom Michael Cera, as George-Michael, was once pre-engaged.  (Maybe the thing with Maebe will work out in the movie), I loved Kieran Culkin’s performance as that totally self-absorbed, cleverer-than-thou, straightish, gay dude we all know.  The video game stuff was clever and varied, and it even worked female hipster demons into the Bollywood dance scene with ex #1, Matthew Patel.  I loved the comic book story boarding.

I essentially loved everything about the movie except for the fact that, in lieu of actual food, JT and I ordered chicken fingers and fries from the movie snack bar.  (Flash photography, I wouldn’t)  I highly recommend against this, as I just barely made it until the end of the movie without pooping my pants.  I am tempted to say the movie went on 10 minutes too long, but I think I’m biased in this regard.

It’s also filmed in Toronto, where JT and I (and my parents) vacationed over spring break.  We were at Casa Loma not that long ago.  However, SPvTW is hardly the travelogue of Toronto that Ferris Bueller’s Day Off was of Chicago.  Maybe that’s one thing it could have done better.